At the pool one day…

Ryan: The boys are doing way more flips and tricks off the diving boards than the girls.
Me: Girls do stuff like that too. When I was a girl I used to do all sorts of flips and tricks off diving boards.
Ryan: Yeah, but that was back in the olden days.

Discussing waking up in the morning…

Me: When I was a kid, Grandma Karen used to stomp on her bedroom floor to wake me up in the morning. I could hear it because my room was underneath hers.
Ryan: Was that before alarm clocks were invented?

When daddy paid us a surprise visit at home over lunch and changed into a suit…

Sam: WHOA daddy, you look HANDSOME! Mommy, I didn’t even know that was daddy walking by me. I thought it was the MAYOR!!